My Inspiration...is it for the wrong reason?

Well I find myself once again thinking deeply about my musicianship. I think I may a pretty serious problem. I find myself striving to be the best at my school. I either take my instrument home everyday and practice or stay in the bandroom after school to practice. Trying every bit to stay in front of my competition. See in the coming month we have concert band auditions and our spots in concert band pretty much prove who is the best. I'm in the top three trumpet players at my school but I find those behind me striving as well and those in front also striving. I have planned on the next couple weeks to be deeply focused on my goal of being the best. But when I stopped to think about it today I realized I had lost all my real gift. My gift of playing was to worship the Lord with my playing and I feel as though I don't incorporate time to just sit down play a nice hymn I know from memory and be in the presence of the Lord. This thought brought me to tears. For I know that if I don't use my gift for the right reasons I am in danger of loosing that gift. I pray with all my heart that with the help of the Lord I will find my way back to worshipping him with my gift.

I ask now for your prayers in this specific area of my life. I thank you all for reading this. It means so much. You're all in my prayers as well.

Blessings,

Kathryn :)